Wednesday, December 22, 2010

An open letter to snow plow drivers

Dear Snow plow drivers,

Winter has arrived and I know you guys are excited. Lots of snow to plow, piles to make, cars to cake with thick sludge, garbage cans to knock over, people to cuss at for driving too close, people to cuss at for parking their car on the street, coffee to drink, etc. Yay! Its a fun time. While I do appreciate all the work that you do to clear the roads lay the salt down (although my street seems to be LAST on your list) etc.

I have a small bone to pick with you. Last year I looked the other way when you piled snow on my park strip that was nearly 10 feet tall. Mind you there is a vacant lot right next door that you could pile snow on till your hearts content. But no, you just kept on piling. Normally this would not bother me, but the salt that you use kills the grass and all other living plants. This basically means that I have to re-sod my park strip every year. I am sure that you don't realize what a pain in the ass it is to scrape up dead grass, go to the yard store to get enough sod to lay on my park strip. Surely if you did you wouldn't be such an ass.

This year, you have taken it to a new level. It seems that you are just f&*^in with me now. Not only are you piling the snow on my park strip again but you have also been piling the snow in front of my driveway. Now I can appreciate the fact that you feel the need to give me a core workout but seriously, im not that fat. The first time I laughed. The 2nd time I laughed less, then you did it a 3rd time. I didn't laugh. I cussed. alot. This last storm was super heavy wet snow. My snowblower does not work well with slush. I think you know this. I came home last night to find a 3 ft snowbank in front of my driveway. Wet, heavy, slushy snow. After much work, I finally cleared my entry to my driveway. My back hurts, my arms hurt and Im pissed. Next time I see you, your gettin the finger instead of the neighborly wave I have been giving you.

Merry Christmas DICK!


dug said...

have you ever seen "beautiful girls"?

maybe it's like that. you have a very angry ex out there.

eric said...

dude. if anyone from draper city reads this, you're gonna get a driveway full of wet slushy stuff.

Nate said...


It didnt take them reading this for that to happen. Been there, done that.